Stop Blaming Others

Chapter 22 ~ Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

When something doesn’t meet our expectations, many of us operate with assumption, “When in doubt, it must be someone else’s fault.” You can see this assuption in action almost everywhere you look—something is missing, so someone else must have moved it; the car isn’t working right, your expences exceed your income, so your spouse must be spending too much money; the house is a mess, so you must be the only person doing your part; a project is late, so your colleagues at work must have not done their share—and on and on it goes. 

This type of blaming thinking has become extremely common in our culture. On a personal level, it has let us to believe that we are never completely reasponsible for our own actions, problems, or happiness. On a societal level, it has led to frivolous lawsuits, and ridiculous excuses that get criminals off the hook. When we are in the habit of blaming others,  we will blame others for our anger, frustrations, depession, stress, and unhappiness. 

In terms of personal happiness, you cannot be peaceful while at the same time blaming others,  Surely there are times when other people and / or circumstances contribute to our problems, but it is we who must rise to the occasion and take responsibility for our own happiness. Circumstances don’t make a person, they reveal him or her.

As an experiment, notice what happens when you stop blaming others for anything and everything in your life.  This doesn’t mean you don’t hold people accountable for their actions, but that you hold yourself accountable for your own happiness and for your reactions to other people and the circumstances around you. When the house is a mess, rather than assuming you’re the only person doing your part, clean it up! When you’re over budget, figure out where you can spend less money. Most important, when you’re unhappy, remind yourself that only you can make yourself happy. 

Blaming others takes an enormous amount of mental energy. It’s a “drag-me-down” mindset that creates stress and disease. Blaming makes you feel powerless over your own life because your happiness is contingent on the actions and behavior of others, which you can’t control. When you stop blaming others, you will regain your sense of personal power. You will see yourself as a choice maker.  You will know that when you are upset,  you are playing a key role in the creation of your own feelings. This means that you can also play a key role in creating new, more positive feelings. Life is a great deal more fun and much easier to manage when you stop blaming others.  Give it a try and see what happens.


Basic Mitten Cuff Tutorial

Trying to adjust the color of my lettering to burgundy and not remembering how makes this monday manic, frustration sets in for the awaken moodiness, and it’s tiring not only from that but the weather isn’t the greatest outside it’s cloudy, and rainy. the air is crisp and the temperature is an enjoyable 51 degree’s for winter this is outstanding.

Anyways, annoyed as I was when it was colder outside and not having a yard for my dog to run in is harder for anybody. To step out in the chilly air without any gloves or mittens was beyond reasonable. Upon returning inside the house trying to warm up my hands went to place my hands under warm water only to find it absolutely freezing, more freezing than the cold water. What on Earth? I ran the hot water for twenty minutes still cold. I thought: Who can I call to see if maybe my hot water tank flame blew out? Hmm, I wondered the neighbor was working, the man of the house was running errands, and I couldn’t get the wall off to see if the flame was out. Well I waited till 7 pm the man of the house came home and took down the wall and lit the flame and we had hot water. Woot-Woot 

Besides all of that my hands were still freezing, the temperature that day was minus 18 degree’s. I didn’t have any gloves or mittens. So I found this really neat video on how to make mittens, this is how to make the cuff first before the actual mitten itself.  I’m sure after this video is the second video on how to make the mitten. Pretty color and easy to make if you know how to crochet.




Two Days



Hello All, I am quite busy since the holidays have passed, Birthday’s came and went. Then I’ve been crocheting small things while having the HUGE 6 foot blanket in between the little well needed things I’ve been making. I found a pattern for the swiffer mop. Yes the company makes these swiffer pads that you use once and throw away, depending on the size of container you buy. 8 count pads, 12 count pads or 36 count pads.  One day I ran out of the pads I had the 36 count ones. I bought the non-brand kind thought it was a great value and used 2 or 3 of them and was disappointed. Well as I was searching for a certain baby blanket pattern, I came across this pattern for a swiffer mop cover. I was ever so excited!! I just bought a couple months ago cotton yarn and was going to make cotton washcloths, towels, soap bar saver’s, scrubbies for dishes, and other cutsie things for my girls all handmade goodies placed in a light wicker basket all dressed up in pretty tissue paper with a pretty bow at the top handle for them.

Here’s the puicture that tickled me pink ~ 


I made one. Told my oldest daughter about it and she wants one too. Before too long I’ll be making a bunch of them to sell. Maybe some for my sister’s for xmas next year. It took me two days to make and it wasn’t as hard as I thought it would be. It actually works better than the swiffer wipes.  Not a bad Monday at all….

Turn Your Melodrama into a Mellow-Drama

Chapter 20 ~  Don’t Sweat The Small Stuff

In a certain respect, this strategy is just another way of saying, “Don’t sweat the small stuff.”  Many people live as if life were a melodrama—- “an extravagantly theatrical play in which action and plot predominate.” Sound familiar? In dramatic fashion, we blow things out of proportion, and make a big deal out of little things. We forget that life isn’t as bad as we’re making it out to be. We also forget when we’re blowing things out of proportion, we are the ones  doing the blowing. 

I’ve found that simply reminding myself that life doesn’t have to be a soap opera is a powerful method of calming down. When I get too worked up or start taking myself too seriously ( which happens more than I like to admit), I say to myself something like, ” Here I go again.  My soap opera is starting.”  Almost always, this takes the edge off of my seriousness and helps me laugh at myself.  Often, this simple reminder enables me to change the channel to a more peaceful station. My melodrama is transformed into a “mellow-drama.” 

If you ever watched a soap opera, you’ve seen how the characters will take little things so seriously as to ruin their lives over them—someone says something to offend them, looks at them wrong, or flirts with their spouse. Their response is usually, “Oh my gosh. How could this happen to me?” Then they exacerbate the problem by talking to others about “how awful it is.”  They turn life into an emergency—a melodrama.

The next time you feel stressed out, experiment with this strategy—remind yourself that life isn’t an emergency and turn your melodrama into a mellow-drama. 

Vacation Time


I’m so excited in a couple of weeks My family and I are going on a Vacation. It’s not going to be long trip this time but it will be away from the chaotic city life for a few days. I have the pleasure of working from home with my side small business I created from the ground up back in 2007 when my children were small. I thought how great it would be to make money from handmade Crocheted items and sell them. I started making blankets that were custom made. I would ask my customers for three colors. Three colors for the desired blanket itself, and I would take a one of the colors for the trim of the blanket. So If the blanket was country blue, tan, and dusty rose, I would find a multi-colored yarn that had all three of those colors in the skein and blend them with the rest of the blanket. I don’t like working with solid colors unless I necessarily have too.  The two pictures down below I have already sold. 


The right picture was used with special edition yarn the colors were for that one: Plum was the main color, lilac and light gray it was made for a my best friend who had MS and Leukemia. She passed away from MS four months ago and her husband threw away the blanket I made for her. Now if I were to sell her blanket it would have been two hundred and fifty American dollars. The Left beginning strip was a pillow case cover for a couch throw pillow to match the accent pillow underneath. 


This Burgundy Beauty is six foot wide and six feet long  well it’s going to be, still working on it and will be taking it with me on my trip. It has four hundred stitches in a row, each row took a whole hour to complete.


This is a close-up of the seashell trim with the bobble stitch to make them look like roses, as I was trying to shape them. The rest of the blanket was made with the American double crochet stitch. If I were to sell this blanket I’d sell it for six hundred and fifty American Dollars because it is time consuming, took about twelve skeins of yarn, and the size of it covers a King Size bed.